The Joys of Pregnancy

In my last post I mentioned that this baby very well may be my last.  Why? My body hates me.  Yes, yes it does.  It doesn't help that my figure is, ahem, portly.  Allow me to whine elucidate on what some of these joys have been third time around: 


Round Ligament Pain - any sudden or even well planned body movement punctuated by a tugging feeling best described as someone yanking on your uterus straps. Do uteruses . . . uteri . . . those things have straps? Mine must because they are being pulled and snapped like industrial rubber bands.  


Heartburn - the Dante's Inferno of the esophagus.  Pretty self explanatory.


Gas - I don't mean the kind I'm cooking with on my stove.  


Nausea - I've never been out to sea, nor have I even seen the ocean.  But this landlubber's gut has been listing like a sailor newly set into port.  


Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction - this one is actually a new one for me.  So delightful walking around feeling like you did as a child and your feet slipped off your banana seat bike pedals and racked yourself on the bar.  Or even more so like a pair of steel toed cowboy boots kicked you in your lady bits and scampered away. 


Again I am reminded why God, in HIS infinite wisdom, made us women responsible for carrying new life.  My hubby wouldn't last a day in my swollen ankles.  Pregnancy sure is hard on a body, but these "joys" are fleeting in the grand scheme of things. Let me leave you with a few more I forgot above: 


Down Periscope - your 3.5 year old son tries peeking down your bellybutton to check on the baby. 


Lullaby - your nearly 5 year old daughter whispers and pats your tummy saying "I love you" to the little one within. 


Poke-a-Boo - you finally reach the point where baby is big and strong enough to poke back when you press on different spots of your stretch-markified abdomen.  (I've earned every one of those stripes by the way.)


Ironman - you see the love in your husbands eyes as he takes a gander at your blooming baby belly. Rough hard-working hands that can be so gentle on the tender, tired skin.  (Not to mention the little extra swagger in his walk when you know his inner monologue is bragging for having potent swimmers.) 


Blessed - knowing that God graced you with the blessing of children, despite being unworthy at times of such a gift. 


Joys of Pregnancy?? Yes, indeed.