It's Okay to Care

My first therapy appointment went well; the counselor and I formed a very nice rapport with one another off the bat. I look forward to continuing work with her to get a firmer grip on multiple issues. There's no shame in getting help when you need it and I did. The holidays passed peacefully and we've enjoyed the week off of school for my daughter. Lots of lazy PJ days. This is a good thing.
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Andy Rooney passed away this November. I loved that old codger and his opinionated manner. He once said "There was never a writer who didn't hope that in some small way he was doing good with the words he put down on paper and, while I know it's presumptuous, I've always had in my mind that I was doing some little bit of good." This was actually in part of a further quote that was a public apology for a supposed derogatory remark, but the substance of the first part still means the same. I'm not so presumptuous to suppose I'm a 'writer' or person of interest worthy to impact the world. I don't have his age, experience, or talent; we do sport similar eyebrow styles. However, this is my blog - my outlet for the bats in my belfry - and I'll say what I feel needs saying. Hopefully some words that I put down during my life will connect with the right readers.
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So, here we are on the heels of 2012. The real meat of my post was to speak up about a growing and disturbing trend I've noticed. When did it become a bad thing to "care?" Specifically, I am sick of hearing "I don't care what anyone thinks." "I will do whatever makes me feel good, who cares about how it impacts others."

In my mind, that way lies danger. G.K Chesterton said “To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it.” Where does this selfish entitlement come in that people feel that indulging every whim or notion is healthy? How can we be good neighbors, family members, followers of God, and role models if every action is lived for self gratification with no concern of recourse or repercussions? Just because you CAN do something doesn't always mean you SHOULD. We should care how our lives impact others. I care if my life is a positive presence in someone else's world. I care if it is a negative drain and would thus wish to know if it is in my power to change it. I'm not saying be a slave to other people's opinions. We are all entitled and welcome to beautifully march to the beat of our own drums, but within the limits of a Hippocratic-esque oath to fellow man: try to do no harm. Call me archaic with antique notions, but sometimes discomfort due to how friends and loved ones perceive us can on occasion be the voice of our conscience. We are built with one for a reason: to use.


The more someone protests they aren't hurting anyone by their actions, or they do not owe an explanation for their actions, or various excuses merely shows a defensive attitude that is in conflict with what they are trying to purport. Someone who truly doesn't care what others think or experience based on their actions do not feel the need to proclaim it. They just live that way. When an adult goes on about it, that says to me "thou dost protest too much." Meaning, you say you don't care - you say you owe no excuses or explanations - but isn't that what you are doing? We should never hide who we are. If you make a life choice, have the courage and conviction to stand behind it. Wishy washy backpedaling never got anyone anywhere. Especially forward.


2012 is a new year of unlimited potential. I'm not one for making resolutions. I think resolutions are made knowing they will be broken and dissolved. Instead I want to have hopes for 2012. Hope, the thing with feathers, to take perch in my soul and if the conditions are right - take flight.

Here are some:

To laugh more than I cry.

To give more than taking.

To know more forgiveness than grudging.

To look for more kindness than meanness, in myself and others.

To be in Church more often than a store.

To live more, fear less.

To accept myself as the flawed being I am while remembering I can try to do better.

To have courage in facing the negatives in my life and being brave enough to healthily deal with them.

To give thanks more often than considering wants.

and

to clean out all junk drawers and closets.

Cheers, Court