Friendship

What does friendship mean to you? Is it based on how that person makes you feel about yourself or how you make that person feel? Is it more material and based on gifts and the like - giving or receiving  How about the capacity for sharing and forgiveness, do those rank highly?

The reason I ask is because my brain was crunching away on the concept and I know what it means to me. I'm curious as to the thoughts of others.  In this age of overwhelming social media we are all equipped with an awesome power of "connectedness."  We have hundreds, or for some, thousands even - of "friends" on network sites and blogs. Our contact lists in those handy little smartphones are seemingly endless. But how dang many of them are real?

How many of them do you sit down with for a real chat and cup of cheer? How often is there a physical shoulder to support the weight of your tears and woes? When you are at your worst, who gives you their best without needing a return on the emotional investment? When was the last time you sent or received an actual piece of correspondence; the tactile feel of paper a delight with eyes feasting on words written in a dear hand? An art of communication is broken down now. We say so much on facebook, posting our glories and irritations on a billboard of publicity, yet falter when it comes to a verbal conversation with a chance run-in at town. I'm as guilty as anyone else at this. I get awkward with surprise meetings. Heck, I feel awkward with planned ones as well.

I have my family, extended family, and a handful of genuine friends.  I have no shame in not possessing "lots and lots" of friends. Sure, there are acquaintances and people that I enjoy keeping in touch with. But those true-blue, kindred spirit, bosom buddy, meat to my potatoes kind of friends? They are rare, hard to find, an earnest loving effort to keep, and rewarding to the extreme. They sustain me, they uplift me, they fill my cup to full measure. A busy/hectic/sprawling social life is not something I want. Being cool or popular has never been my priority. Being loved, respected, and valued by my small circle is more than sufficient.

Even with all that, one final art worth mentioning seems lost. The capacity to be content with ourselves. Solitude and time alone shouldn't be uncomfortable or leave you pining for "action."  Slow down, embrace silence, get to know yourself again. Then armed with that self knowledge, you are better equipped to know what you have to give to others.

With that, I'm done.  I have a diaper to change, a dog to feed, and a dishwasher calling my name to be emptied; but not until after I check with my husband to make sure he mailed out the thick fistful of notes to people via snail mail. I might have to take out a small loan to post them all.

Cheers, Court