I think for most parents a primary goal is to raise good children. To raise little people who know right from wrong, have the foundation to be strong enough when choosing in between the two, be conscientious of others, know their own self worth while respecting others, and ultimately turn those little people into good big people. When I hear or read in the news all the atrocities around us, the irresponsibility, the disdain for fellow man and the foundering of the world God gave us dominion over - it hits me so hard that we are failing. We, collectively, are turning our backs on genuine purpose in life. I cannot change the world, but I can change me. I can put forth elbow grease to ease the passage for my children. I can help my children become the person I should have been. Imagine if we all put the best of ourselves into our little ones; it would be a glorious sight, indeed.
Hubs and I try to teach our children morals, values, and impress upon them the importance of good character. We are naturally conservative, not only are we Catholic but we also stick to fairly old-fashioned gender roles in our family unit. Hubs is the head and primary breadwinner, I'm the stay at home mom/wife. Some would think we're in the dark ages, but I think my vocation as wife and mother is pretty enlightening most times.
Anywho, part of character formation relies on a powerful tool: stewardship. Teaching your children to be responsible and giving people is a wonderful gift. Stewardship can take so many forms; it isn't hard to incorporate and the lifelong lessons learned by it will bear beautiful fruits (or nuts like in our family, we're strange like that.)
Some simple examples:
*We stress the importance of recycling; we must be stewards of the Earth.
*We teach the children that wasting food, water, and electricity is not a good choice when so many others have none; what food waste we do have is always collected in a scrap bucket to feed the chickens and compost to give back to the Earth. The kids regularly turn off all the lights if any are left on. Sometimes with me still in the bathroom, on the toilet . . . oh well I do some of my best thinking on the throne in the dark.
*We share meals with friends and family; hospitality and generosity is never a bad gesture and nearly always received with thankfulness and in turn inspires that person to "pass it on."
*When you have, then give. We regularly go through our things, the kids's toys, clothing, etc. and do a purge. They actively participate in this and play a major role in what they can do without, what they can share with another, what extraneous items that aren't used much and could be of better use to someone else. If your kids have trouble letting go, make them watch an episode of hoarders. I bet their fingers will be itching to thin the crop! These goods we glean are always donated. We've only had stuff enough for a garage sale two or three times in all the years we have been together and our prices were so cheap that we rarely made enough money to be worth the effort. So, donations - monetary, foodstuffs, clothing, or other goods to a reputable receiver is a plus. (We do use goodwill at times but prefer local clothes/food pantry, community drives, and other organizations that are non-profit.)
* Have a pet, teach children the responsibility of caring for another living creature.
*Here's a good one that we can all appreciate; put your kids to work. Yup, use that free child labor by giving age appropriate chores for them to be responsible for. They live in their home, show them that they too are responsible for taking care of it. Pride in a job well done or chore completed is a good esteem booster for those little egos. My little Kit is not yet 2 and he nearly always helps me unload the dishwasher. He knows where everything goes already and the smile on his face when he successfully wrestles a heavy pot into the right cupboard is priceless.
*Similarly, let them learn home-ec at home. They want clean clothing -well, help wash and fold it. They want food to eat, let them see and participate in the effort involved in making it. It is easier to just do it yourself as an adult. It's less mess, less time, less work - but letting them help gives them a better concept of what the world holds for an adult.
*Let your children become snail-mail pen pals with someone who is elderly or lonely. Give them a chance to foster a friendship that can bring light to someone else's darkness.
This list isn't the end all - be all - no fail road map to having decent kids. There are adults who don't even put forth more good in this world than what they take. But, with diligence and sacrifice, with loving guidance/direction/discipline - we can raise a new generation that will lead us to a better society to live in. I am already proud of my children. Now to hope that when they are my age with a family of their own, they can be proud of me.
